Few weeks back I have seen (again) after many years Disney’s The Kid. Not sure why, but this is a movie that stirs various emotions in me every time I see it. Each time a different one!

This time, as I am going through significant transformations myself, I was struck by one scene in particular: the main character Russ – a single man in his 40, extremely successful but abrasive, with a sarcastic life philosophy and lots of relationships issues get the chance to meet his 10 years old self Rusty. Curious Rusty is inspecting Russ’s house: calling the dog he was dreaming to have when he grows older and asking him what he is doing for living. Rusty has always dreamt about owning a dog naming Chester and flying planes as a pilot. After a series of probing questions about Russ’ s life, Rusty concludes, “I grow up to be a loser.” With all the explanations Russ is trying to make, showing how successful he is the kid is fully disappointed.

As a coach I always encourage my clients to value and learn from their past experiences, but confidently visualize, dream, and embrace their future. A question I sometimes used when they feel stuck is “Talking to your 70 years old self, what he or she would tell you?”. Now I realized this is only a part of the story… This movie made me think a bit different: if I have the chance to meet my 10 years old self, what would she tell me? Would she be proud of myself or disappointed of what she has become? The truth is: I do not know. As a kid I always dreamed to be a doctor, but somewhere along the way I lost this interest. I took an engineering career for a little while. Strangely, for more than 16 years now, I am doing marketing for medical products, being around doctors and nurses and providing them solutions to help them improve their patients’ lives. Now, I have recently turned into a coach and I am very passionate helping people re-discover themselves, their inner talents and live passionate, fulfilled lives. I think somewhere inside I still feel a strong commitment and passion in helping the people I come across.

Robin Sharma said in one of his talks that “adults are nothing more than deteriorated children”. Over the time of our life we develop beliefs that are the sum of the beliefs of our network (parents, teachers, friends, colleagues, community, etc.) and we come to see the life through these beliefs. Because of these beliefs combined with the desire to “fit in” the community we are living, we sometimes forget who we really are, forget our dreams, the things that make us tick and bring passion. The things that make us happy.

Most of the time we end up in a web where we live unbalanced lives, struggling to balance life commitments with career aspirations. In a small research I made some time ago among mid and senior managers in MedTech industry to get some insights about the challenges they are facing in their lives, majority of them mentioned the pace of life and work family/life balance. Some of the respondents considered that most of the time the family is the “loser”. This feeling is associated with guilt and missing their children’s childhood and add mental pressure and stress in their lives. Others have chosen to slow down their careers and focus on family and kids, but instead of balance they feel trapped, not being able to break the glass ceiling and continue to grow and advance in the work place, struggling with time management and multitasking.

But this is not how it should be. And there is still time to break the web, re-discover ourselves and live the life we want to live. For me, this transformation started few years back when I first come across the CliftonStrength® approach. One of the senior managers in the company I worked at that time gave us as a pre-work before our annual meeting to take this assessment and be ready to share your strengths with the team. This was a surprise approach for me. Most of my previous managers were always focused to improve my weaknesses. Reading the report, I truly had the “aha” moment, not that I did not know who or how I am, but it helped me create the awareness and put the things into perspective. I have just realized that all my life, all my achievements were related to the things I am naturally good at. And all paths I have chosen (school, career, etc.) related to these inner natural strengths. Looking back, I think I was also very fortunate that my parents, especially my father always encouraged me to make my own decision starting early age, supporting me and being ready to provide me the safety net I needed in case I could not get through. I have always got through! Sometimes with bruises, but always happy in the end.

My biggest regret at the time I took the CliftonStrengths® assessment was that we did not follow through with some specialized support on how we can all use these findings in everything we do as individuals and as team. This has given me the determination to close the loop to learn more and get the Gallup certification. Being able to help others re-connect with themselves, understand their talents and how to use them to reach their goals, how to overcome obstacles, weaknesses and vulnerabilities, how to use their strengths to feel confident and transform relationships.

Curious how the movie ends … the 10 years old Rusty and 40 years old Russ had the chance to meet their 70’s self who had everything Rusty dreamed of: a dog named Chester, a family and become a pilot. And they were all happy! He was not a loser after all… He had his wake-up call at the right moment….

What about you? What would your 10 years old self tell you about the life you live now?

Feel free to share your thoughts/comments below. I would love to hear from you.

If you want to discuss more, you may book a 30 min. free discovery session.